Drivers Ed

Is it a common notion that you alone are the only person that knows how to drive? I've had an hour commute on one of the busiest highways in Massachusetts for almost 3 years now, and I'm pretty certain most people out there with me can't drive for shit. People here in MA need a lot of very specified events to come together in order for the commute to go smoothly. First, it can't be sunny out. Solar glare, ya know? I mean honestly people- get some sunglasses! This shouldn't be an occasion for random rapid deceleration. It's the sun, it's probably been around your whole life. Learn to deal. Second, it can't be raining...or snowing...or windy...or lightning. All of those things are scary to drivers. What we need for a pleasant commute is clouds, but no impending weather changes. It drives me batty.
People who don't follow the rules of the road are the worst though. I CANNOT stand when no-one knows what to do at a 4way stop sign. Yielding is also difficult- the whole alternating thing in traffic is too much for people to comprehend. Also, if you are driving on a street and want to turn onto the road that I am at a stopsign at...YOU have the right of way. YOU are driving, I am stopping.
Sheesh. Anyway- it appears that my ovaries may be starting to get the hint about growing now that I've been injecting myself for 3 months. We'll see what happens!!

Living in Limbo

I'm supposed to be on vacation right now. Supposed to be in Vermont hanging with my friends on a dairy farm, cleaning stalls, enjoying the gorgeous weather. I'm at work. My doctors visits for "Operation Try To Convince Your Body To Ovulate" have conveniently fallen smack dab in the middle of the week. It's really great. I am so angry and frustrated with the whole process that I can't even begin to explain my feelings. I can't listen to another person offer me advice and tell me that if I just keep waiting and stay positive- thats the worst- that everything will work out fine. THEY aren't the ones that get u/s and labwork every 3-4 days and nothing changes. I told a friend today that if I am still getting no response in 3 months, I have to stop. I can't take it. My whole life is on hold and being disrupted every week, and for nothing. She said "I guess it depends on how bad you want it." F-you, alleged confidante. F-you and your ideas on what it's like for me to go through this.

Just to make my life more difficult, my riding instructor pulled me aside at my last lesson and told me he wanted me to move up a level to jumping. Why is that bad you ask? Well, turns out if you want to jump, you have to pay out the nose for it. Which, when I had to dip into my savings account to sign up for the initial lesson package, is not a good thing. Sigh.

Here's to hoping that something in my life will become easier in the next week or so. I'm so tired.

Birthdays

Today is my birthday. Hooray. (Insert dripping sarcasm here) I've never liked birthdays. Even when I was little, I thought birthdays were dumb. Don't get me wrong, I like receiving presents and cash, but I never get all worked up for them and make big plans. I think it all stems from the fact that to me, a birthday is really, how popular are you? How many people will come to your party? I think it's weird and slightly disconcerting that I still feel that way at 28, but there it is. I wasn't cool in school. I was a really tall, awkward, coke bottle glasses, braces wearing sort of gal, and that just doesn't get you friends. Now that I'm stunningly gorgeous and have straight teeth and contacts (fine, maybe i'm exaggerating the Stunningly part) I could probably scare up a decent birthday party, but I just don't care enough. Yay. I was born, I have friends. Let's move on with life- presumably so we can get to our next birthday. Another thing I hate about birthdays? Ordering a turkey sub and getting stale bread with it.

Wasting time

So, my boss is on vacation for a month. It must be nice, vacationing in Spain for a month. The hospital is left to run on limited hours and staff in her absence. Really, it makes for an interesting day, sitting at the computer for 12 hours, answering phones. "Oh, I'm sorry to hear Fluffy isn't feeling well" I say, " Would you like to bring Fluffy in tomorrow at 7pm? Thats our next available". Meanwhile, I sit here and twiddle my thumbs and post entries into my blog. It's good times. Yesterday my friend and I planned out her wedding. Did I mention she's not engaged yet? We did some quick mathematical calculations (because we are amazingly intelligent that way) and realized several things: 1) If her boyfriend were to propose to her this month, she'd probably plan her wedding for next August or September 2) If it takes me three more months to get pregnant, I will be due near her wedding date 3) As the matron of honor, I will most assuredly go into labor AT her wedding and ruin her entire life.

On the subject of getting preggo, I had a doctors appointment yesterday, and the nurse thought it would be a grand idea to tell me that in her ten years of experience, she's only encountered ONE other person who responds (or more aptly, doesn't respond) to fertility medications like me. Fabulous! My husband was super enthused with the idea that somehow, in all his magnificent manly glory, he managed to pick an anomaly in the conceiving department, and marry her*. Anyway, onward we trudge...I'm sure some little part of me will miss the nightly injections and biweekly blood draws and invasive ultrasounds if I ever do get pregnant.....


*He's actually been wonderful, I don't want to portray him as a meanie! :)

First Post

It would be great if I could have come up with all sorts of wry, witty headings for my blog and it's subsequent first entry...Alas, I could not. I haven't been witty much recently. My husband and I have embarked upon an almost year long battle to have a child. I've learned a whole lot about the process of getting pregnant, and turns out ovulation is key. This is what has been stumping my body for the past 11 months. Luckily, it's only the FIRST necessary step, and once we master that one we only have like, 15 other hurdles to get through, but lets not count our follicles before they mature! Besides the whole infertility thing, we came up with this great idea to put a new roof on our house during the monsoon season Massachusetss had a couple months ago. It really was fantastic. I've become very adept at recognizing the signs of a panic attack, and encouraging them (gently, of course, you don't want to add any stress) to just go ahead and go away. In any case, I hope this forum gives me a chance to poke fun at myself and others when the opportunity arises, and otherwise get things off my chest. Heres to hoping I can at least come across as a semi-intelligent woman!